WHAT IF? (Movie House)
by reeyachan
Summary: What if the cast of Hunter X Hunter went to see a movie - from choosing what to watch, buying popcorn, to actually "watching"? Shortfic. No pairings. Gon, Killua, Kurapika, Leorio in here. Weird extras XD


**WHAT IF THE HUNTER X HUNTER CAST WENT TO SEE A MOVIE?**

A/N: I just watched the advanced screening of The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn part two yesterday (and it's awesome, btw. gyaaaaaa! XD) and a weird fantasy came into mind: the HxH cast to go to a movie house. I wrote this while waiting in line. Gyahaha! This is the reason why my friends think I'm a lunatic XD I based the movie the cast is "watching" on the movie my _otou-san_ was watching a couple of days ago titled The Hunt for Red October. I found that it was a book based movie and… yeah, just read. XD I hope this will be funny. It's pretty short.

I dedicate this fic to all of the awesome people who have read my humor fics and told me to write more! Yoshida-chan, Ohcher, hinatachan404, Bai-Feng333, Faith Yoite, Butterfree for the writing method, kusarihime143 for the lovely suggestions that I will surely take note of doing, and Kanon58-chan for your awesome reviews on all my fics so far and for spazzing with me XD You guys are awesome! Thank you so much :"

Warning: Some scenes are off and it jumps to and fro weird occurrences; character tortures (because I love them too much) Gyahaaaa~

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters and the movie they're watching XD

* * *

Leorio stopped and walked backwards to take a good look at the list of movies now showing on the theatres inside the mall. He moved his head closer to the glass of the bulletin and narrowed his eyes. Something caught his eye. "The Hu–"

_Bump!_

"OW!" The doctor bumped his head violently on the glass. He fell to the floor (together with the bulletin) head first.

"Honey! Wait for me…!"

Leorio stood up and threw his hands in the air while crying. "Hey! Am I not human enough for you to see!? At least say sorry!"

Sadly, the woman did not even hear him. Leorio is being treated too underrated again. Have pity! For shame! _Sigh…_

"With your question, Leorio, asking if you're not human enough for her to see, apparently states that you really are not human – because she didn't see you," Kurapika, as overrated and intelligently annoying as his character is, said as a matter-of-fact, approaching the sneering Leorio.

"_Nani_!?" the doctor snapped and smoke is steamed out of all the holes of his red, red angry head.

"Ha! I couldn't agree more," Killua, another overrated and cheeky I-don't-care-the-hell-with-the-world-I-love-Gon-period character, added while walking beside Kurapika.

Leorio growled like an angry bull.

"Leorio!" Gon, the always annoyingly curious and dares not to hurt anyone he has to hurt and cares for the people he doesn't even know and acts cute to everybody (in short, the _good, good boy_) one, ran to the doctor as soon as he fell face first to the tiled floor. "Are you alright?"

The doctor closed his eyes and nodded once.

Gon smiled, of course, and made the bulletin stand again. He stared at it. "What were you doing, Leorio? You were falling behind."

Leorio, glaring at Kurapika and Killua, pointed at the bottom part of the list and exclaimed, "Look! This looks interesting!" to the top of his lungs.

The three stepped forward to have a closer look.

Leorio, standing tall out of them, while the three was looking closely at what he had pointed, suddenly had an urge to kick Kurapika and Killua's butts to the core. _Buuuurn! Revenge!_ He snickered and stepped backwards, aiming.

Kurapika stood straight and held his chin with his thumb and index finger. "I've read the book version of this a couple of years ago. That was one of the most remarkable novels I got to read."

Killua stood straight as well. "Interesting…"

Gon jumped with delight. "Ne, let's watch this! I think it's interesting too!" Seeing the word 'hunt' on the movie title made him want to watch it too.

"Right now?" asked Kurapika and Killua.

"Yeah!" Gon smiled.

Leorio's mission failed.

Yes, they are at a very public and crowded mall at that time. And no, they did not care about the staring people – who were wondering where on earth did a gel-coated spiky-haired boy who wore short shorts, a white-haired ultra pale-skin kid, a blonde girl-man face dude with weird clothes, and a tall man with useless sun or eye glasses who looked like their lawyer or their father or something came from. Ha! Manga, anime, fantasies, fiction, anything is possible.

* * *

**WHILE BUYING POPCORN**

"I will not pay for it."

Leorio growled and turned his gaze to the two boys who were bickering and fighting over what snack they should buy before going in the theatre.

"I want popcorn!"

"Aaaahh! No! Popcorns are messy and taste like… like… I don't know – salt! One lollipop can last for at least two hours!" The silver-haired boy looked away and meddled with his thoughts. "Or maybe we should buy two, or three? No, that won't do. Five will do just fine." Killua snickered while brushing his fingers evilly against his chin – lips slowly forming a convex curve.

"Killua!" Gon yelled as he stomp his foot against the carpeted flooring.

"Will you please just _shut_ up and decide already!?" Leorio interrupted, separating the two by the head He turned to the shorter one. "Gon, if you want to buy popcorn then buy popcorn!" then at the taller one. "Same goes with you!" The angry doctor then looked over his shoulder with flaring, angry nostrils. "And _you_! I have nothing to say to you!"

The blonde raised an eyebrow nonchalantly. "What did _I_ do to _you_?" He glared and closed his eyes – crossing his arms against his chest. "In _my_ defence, you were the one who said we should watch."

Leorio walked to him with stomping feet and bull-angry face (yes, he was in a really bad mood. Notice how many times the word 'angry' has been stated under his dialogues? Yeah, I'm dead serious). "I only pointed at it! _You_," he circled round while pointing accusingly at the three, "you were the ones who made side comments!"

"So?"

Leorio growled like a monster. "_SO_…!?"

"Well I didn't insist," mused the Kuruta.

"GAAAAAAHHH!"

[Meanwhile while the two were exchanging pointless arguments…]

"Ne, onee-san! I'll buy popcorn!" The spiky-haired kid lifted himself up with his toes to have a good look at the women in the refreshments counter.

This _onee-san_, seeing both Gon and Killua, giggled and smiled her biggest with her eyes sparkling as if she saw precious jewels. "Kyaaaa! You're sooooooo cute!"

Killua just stared in disbelief at first but snickered when he thought of something good. He smiled his cutest (asdfghjkl imagine Killua smiling cutely ackkkk XD) and imitated Gon who was leaning on the counter higher than them. "Ne, onee-chan, I'll buy candy!"

Onee-san grew extremely excited that she shrugged and danced in delight with heart eyes (trust me on this: exaggerate this scene!). She almost died with all the moe moe flowers floating around the two overly adorable boys in front of her. "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

* * *

**ENTERING THE THEATRE**

"Those are many," Kurapika mused while walking past the ticket line, completely mesmerizing the ticket lady, while dragging the unconscious Leorio using his chains. "You _bought_ those?"

Gon entered with Kurapika while dragging a huge bag of cheese flavoured popcorn about his size while smiling.

Killua followed with his own huge bag of chocolates and candies, wearing his neko face while responding with, "Nope. We got them for free." :3

* * *

**INSIDE THE MOVIE THEATRE**

"Pwaaaahh! It'sh sho darkff!" Gon exclaimed while chewing on his popcorn.

"Ew Gon! Don't spit your popcorn on me!" Killua leaned away from Gon, disgusted, then went back to his glorious sweets – forgetting everything else.

Kurapika sweat dropped.

The theatre became even darker with the side lights turned off. The screen showed an image and the very loud _Digital Surround Sound_ opening score for 20th Century Fox began playing.

It snapped the hell out of Leorio. He rose, bewildered, and exclaimed, "I'm awake! I'm awake!"

"SSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!"

_BAM!_

Super ultra mega punch.

* * *

When the huge, huge bags of popcorn and candies were finished (and yes, the two finished eating them in less than two hours. I know. Unbelievable), the movie was halfway over. It was so much quieter than 5 minutes ago – when the movie was almost halted because Gon and Killua were playing inside the operator's room and accidentally shut the whole theatre down and accidentally pressed the fire alarm after that. Because of Kurapika's annoyingly right and moral ramblings scolding the two of them, they finally sat still and finally watched the movie. Oh, really?

Sitting arrangement [facing the screen; from right to left] Killua, Gon, Kurapika, Leorio.

Killua, completely ignoring the movie, gazed around inside the cinema house, eyeing each person in each seat (well only the ones who couldn't keep their hands to themselves; you know, _couples_) happily, excitingly, devilishly, wearing his biggest evil grin out of all his big evil grins in the world. He snickered and shook the hell out of the spiky-haired boy seated beside him on his left – snickering endlessly and holding back a very loud laugh. "Gyahahaha! They aren't even watching! This is _more_ entertaining than the movie!"

Gon, completely ignoring his insultingly observant friend (Killua: Hey!), literally faced 180 degrees to his left with furrowed, confused eyebrows while asking the same inane questions to his blonde friend over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. "Ne, Kurapika, what are they doing? What is an airship doing underwater? Airships can fly under water? Does it have Nen? Can Nen work under water?" [On the screen] A man was shot. "Waaahh! Poor man. I hope he'll not die. I wonder if the bullet has Nen. Hey! That reminds me of Pakunoda-san!"

Kurapika, completely ignoring his annoyingly curious, can't-sit-and-wait-for-the-movie-to-tell-the-story-that-he-has-to-ask-what-will-happen-next-and-that-he-adds-pointless-comments-to-every-scene-which-leads-to-another-Mito san-and-Whale-Island-and-previous-adventures-story-over-and-over-and-over-again friend, shook his head while grimly and disbelievingly stared with dismay at the screen. He crossed his arms against his chest and sighed exasperatingly. He grimaced. "I could not believe they would leave out the good parts. This is very disappointing. The book is no doubt _much_ better than this movie. Tsk~"

Leorio, completely ignoring everything, snored like a crying choking pig that sounds like its throat was tied tightly with a rope from within and couldn't breathe. Can you imagine? Yeah, I know, it's disgusting. Forgive the guy. He was knocked out cold… again. For shame! Hmp.

And again, yes, there were people inside the theatre – quite many, actually. Now, what will you _do_ if you were watching there too?

END.

* * *

A/N: I was a little demented (of course not literally!) while writing this. Forgive me and please excuse my careless descriptions XD Oh please do review again :")


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